LAST WILL: Steven Hawking Denounced Liberal ‘Junk Science’ On His Death Bed

Steven Hawking wasn’t alone when he died last night. His loving wife, Barbara, was by his side, holding his hand and listening to his last thoughts. As he drifted off to sleep one last time, Hawking said something his spouse of nearly 30 years never saw coming. She told Variety:

“Steven said he believed in his cosmology work. He also said the reason they can’t figure out what caused the Big Bang is because it was most likely God.

He was also adamant that ‘global warmimg’ was a hoax. He chuckled as he looked out the bedroom window at the Noreaster in March.

Steven dying wish was that people would stop falluing for livberal “junk science” and embrace that we know so little because we are all children of God.”

The conversation was run through Hawking’s voice generator, so it has been recorded for all to hear. Barbara Hawking said she doesn’t need money but she’s considering releasing the recording so people will stop being blinded so scientists can keep their cushy jobs doing nothing.

Hawking was also baptized and took communion from the Anglican Church this past week. He must have known he was going to meet his maker and figured after 76 years…it was time to cover his ass.

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